Knowing the Known

This is not a new experience for me that I feel, ‘I know my surroundings’ but every time I take a slow, vigilant walk even on the same, everyday path, I find something different. Sometimes I know the places from outside, but have never entered in and the first time I enter in those premises I am new in my own surroundings.

I knew the location of ITI on the ITI road, had seen the students while crossing the road but had never interacted with them. I didn’t know anyone personally who goes to ITI. Thinking about ways to contribute for water conservation I had secretly thought to myself that I want to become a plumber and close/ repair all the taps which are flowing relentlessly. I had even stood wondering against the board which exhibited the long list of interesting courses, ‘how the traditional learning systems of these arts, crafts and life skills are getting replaced by ITI’. All this about an institution which I had never entered. I was starkly aware that I don’t know the world within these four walls which I am peeping into from outside.

The opportunity of PB (Participatory Budgeting) made me think of ITI as a probable educational institute to tie up with, to involve the students in PB work for the mutual benefits of the students as well as the society. The former get the quality education through experiential learning while the society, in the long run, gets wise and active citizens. I am realizing the power of Internship system!

I wasn’t conversant with the world I was expecting there and hence had low confidence to approach the Principal without any hotline. I found the telephone number on the net and called the college to book an appointment with him. The peon actually asked me, ‘should I forward the call to him, he is available now?’ Surprise!! Reminds me of a phrase in vernacular ‘zaritale shukracharya’! But this experience was exactly opposite. I spoke to the principal in detail about PB and asked for his time to explore how we could involve students. I managed to convince my senior colleague who is known for his wide array of understanding people from varied background along with his charming style of speaking. He promised to come along. ‘His presence is half victory’ this was my feeling before the meeting.

We enter the cabin. I keep quiet as promised to myself and understood between us. The principal is busy doing some work. Some exams are going on while there is a long queue standing outside the administration department for new admission. He seemed to have decided that he doesn’t want to entertain us nor does he want to start anything new in the college. He was least interested in what my senior colleague was trying to tell him. Except for few leads he had practically closed our file.

We get up to go out; me thinking about the thoughts that I had before entering. I just need to drop the fear of disappointment. Some will like what you propose some may not. The onus is not on you, if you have made the best effort with the best intension. Thanks to my senior colleague for demonstrating how to take disappointments and to the principal who thought of disappointing us.    

A walk with the boss

We hugged each other a little longer than ever, on the main road, oblivious to the trailing traffic at those late hours. It was a hug of assurance, reconfirmation, and security. I turned back and walked like a queen, the 2 minute walk to my home.

It was one of the most important meetings of my life, a heart to (an experienced) heart talk with my boss. She is not actually a ‘boss’ ‘boss’ but in the organizational hierarchy she is one. I am obliged to have one like that and same is the feeling of almost all my colleagues towards her. The most democratic, flexible, genuinely good at heart person who is sensitive enough about everyone around her; she is the life of most of our work lives.

As already mentioned a couple of times before, this participatory budgeting work is pretty overwhelming and a lot of turmoil generating. There are various kinds of turmoil that one goes through: one about the unusual kinds of work that one has to do as being community facilitator and other, the exposure one gets after doing the planned work which leads to newer realizations about system and life in general.

I am going through both of them (and of course there are many more). But today’s episode started with the later one. The SWM story of the city is making me think and rethink about everything. While writing the article, ‘how is this justice?’, I broke down looking at the cruelty a city dweller does to the surrounding villagers without even intending to do it. Neither is one aware about doing it nor is one sensitive towards the victims. It wasn't the case that I didn't know it before but seeing all the connected dots together as a picture, made its impact on me. I couldn't come out of it easily almost for the entire day neither did I want to distract myself from the feeling. I was more than sure that it makes more sense to feel it and go through the turmoil to come out with more vigor to work. I could also see that I needed some assistance from someone who has gone through such feelings and phases of life.

SM would have been of utmost help. But I could see that she was busy. Also, I feel selfish when I ask of her time for personal reasons. So I suggested a couple of times but didn't assert it. But finally, when we were chatting late evening she suggested that we could even meet. What can be a better thing than that when you have waited for a person for a long! Staying close by at a walking distance matters at such times. Before the hand could cross a quarter of a circle in the clock, we had already set out on our walk together.

So many things did we speak… the questions that I had about sustainable cities, the inertia that I am facing in the CF work, the stereotypes that I have in my mind about various people that I should be meeting, the fight between the rational me and the stereotyping (irrational) me, her experiences as novice (that I am today), the ideas of newer work, newer ideas to take the current work ahead, the people that we connect with and the once which we don’t but should be connecting with, the importance of emotional connection with the work and the colleagues…     

I could see myself getting better. She was in no hurry even at that hour. She waited patiently for me to say that ‘we could go now’. So much space and time! She proved me wrong for a sentence that I wrote to partner in the afternoon, ‘Everyone seems to be busy.’ I know she is doing so many things at a time and still nowhere shows that she is busy and when mentioned, she actually modestly says that she is not so busy.  

On the way back, I was wondering aloud that how do people who don’t connect with their work and the colleagues manage to remain themselves? She resonated with the feeling and shared X’s example of how X did a non-connecting job and finally left it to do so many socially inclined activities. SM verbalized her fear about how does X remain saner after working so much. I guess, we go through all these phases of non-sensitivity, sensitivity, guilt, non-action, finally action without guilt based on rational sensitivity.

Thanks SM for walking me through the mud of my thoughts to the clean blue waters of action! May everyone get a boss like you!

How is this justice?

Solid waste management (SWM) seems to be the most sensitive issue after water in the city context. In villages especially if you have farms all your wet waste goes to the farm directly. No service of waste collection is necessary in such setting. But what happens to the waste generated by every citizen in the city? Why isn’t the onus of taking care of the generated waste come on the respective citizen? Why does the PMC have to provide this service?

Looking at the cities, every time, I remember Shumaker’s small is beautiful. The forces of making the city big are so big that how do we adhere to the small? So while growing in terms of population, area, economy, products and services the cities move away from the basic natural services available and necessary for the survival of life, something like water, raw material for food. It’s such a stark contrast which very few urban citizens realize.

SO our water comes from at least 50 km away from the dams built by drowning hundreds of villages and shifting another hundreds and  rehabilitating very few of them. Our grains, veggies and fruits come from the nearby villages and national, international places, thanks to transport facilities and LPG (liberalisation, privatization and globalisation). So the 2 basic needs of water and food are taken care of not by us but by somebody else who get low and uncertain prices for the farm produce, curse of the middle class if the prices rise beyond a certain limit. The third need of shelter, Not Abudana but Ashiyana of the cities are built by the bricks made by irreversible processing of top soil most important for growing of the food.

So we rip the natural resources available in the countryside and become ‘rich’ in the cities. What do we give back to them? What do we have, to give back? The sewage starting from our toilets directly connected to the rivers which flows to these villages supplying water for drinking, washing and farming directly (without any cleaning plants in between) and sometimes if the Sewage Treatment Plants are working generously, a good dose of chlorine to kill the bacteria from the black water which also can harm the other life in the river. The un-segregated waste we generate finds its way on the fertile lands of these villages making the villagers and the waste pickers susceptible to all kinds of health hazards.

How is this justice? We take from them all that is good and in return give them all that is bad.

What is the solution? Leave the cities? Is that possible?

How about making the cities sustainable? Is that even conceivable? What does that mean at the value level and at the practice level?          

A walk by bike

After reiterating the obstacle in the ‘know your ward’ step at least 10 times, we came up with an explicit action of meeting well identified community people. Who were they? Organizations of people in the informal sector! Yes they exist and they very well have a proper formal structure. I still don’t know why they are called informal sector but they are so inevitable part of the society. The surroundings are clean because of them and they are not even doing it by choice. Who would like to put our hands in the dirt themselves? This reminds me of the Marathi movie ‘Fandry’, It’s a must watch.

So I get a couple of contact numbers to start with. Having a phone number feels like such an important step to start with! Wonder what they did to meet new people when there were no phones? They are among the staff of the organization which works in solid waste management in the city. It’s a cooperative and works with the PMC. I called up the moment I got the number and asked for some time. One brick of inertia broken! Once I get the time I would surely be present for the meeting.

I didn't sound that attractive on the phone. He agreed to give me time but postponed it last minute to the next day. I was ready to go wherever the person would be on the field but he insisted he comes to my office to meet me. He appeared an hour late on the postponed day. I was skeptical about the meeting when AM disbelieved that people from that particular organization could be like that. He was right. Once I met the person and detailed him the reason of investigations (!), he was very much an open well where I could draw as much water as I wanted. He had all the time in the world to show me around and speak to me. Also, the work and the people involved demanded that he doesn't work according to the watch but according to the need of the time. I couldn't blame him for not coming on time. Anyway, punctuality is not a basic virtue, it’s a secondary one. (I have debated within myself about it and I am an opportunistic punctual person!!)

We decided to go by bike as we had to cover larger area and visit 3 – 4 spots. But this was very much a part of the tool ‘Ward walk’ and he was very much a key informant about the prabhag that I am working in.

The world that didn’t exist in my world was the world he lived and worked with. This was almost the first time I was going to connect to this world officially. He took me to an elite society where they had recently started composting within the premises. The reasons to start were amazing. The person who used to collect the waste from the society and dump at the public waste bin nearby was punished by PMC for doing so. (What! I don’t believe this. It’s like leaving the thief and punishing the saint ‘Chor sodun sanyashyala bali! ’) So the organization intervened and started a dialogue with the society. An enthusiastic woman who is the secretary of that society got convinced and managed to convince everyone. They segregate 100 % of their waste at source. A compost pit is made in the premises itself and the dry waste is sold out to scrap. Wow!! Wish everyone does that.

When asked about the specialties of the ward that he perceives, he says, ‘So many literate people, so many foreign returned people, so many politicians and still the state of solid waste management is so bad.’ There were some more that he mentions other than these like; the staff of the organization gets better salaries in this area compared to the other city parts. This area is a mix of newly developed area and old habitation. A colleague of him joins the discussion at a sorting shade + an organic waste composting (OWC) unit run in premises of a national organization for last 5 years successfully. The in-charge of this task from the staff of the national org boasts to have this unit on their campus and mentions how happy they are to have it. The OWC machine is underutilized and hence they are approaching residential societies nearby to take their waste. Of course, the residents inside the organization and outside it don’t segregate their waste at source.

The major problem that they face is apathy of citizens towards segregation at source. It is such a simple thing to do but the attitude comes in between. The most civilized, sophisticated argue that they pay for the service, they should get it. What they don’t understand is the cost does not include the service of segregation, it’s an individual responsibility and everyone has to do it not just morally but legally as well. The staff to some extent has even accepted that the citizens are not going to change their attitude and has been asking for well equipped (! A washroom, some drinking water and a shelter on the head) sorting shades instead. But even that doesn't sound important to the formal sector of the society.

They have demanded their basic needs to the administration and to the elected representatives but all in vein. I am sure the other side of the table will have their own reasons to share. These people also filled up the PB forms last year and followed it up with the Ward office only to receive no feedback on their suggestions. They look forward to making the PB process more transparent and accountable. They also realized that filling up the forms after group discussions would help than individual submissions.

On the way, he also shares the interesting dynamics between powerful people in the ward. An aspirant for the post of Corporator runs a private ghantagadi (a vehicle collecting waste from society to society which rings the bell when it reaches in any area, hence the name) free of cost distracting people from a service like their which is fair. He indicates to another man who is pushing a wheel barrow loaded with lot of waste bags and tells me that he earns Rs. 20K from a job in PMC. I am awestruck to know that the person demands that he would continue doing this extra work to earn some extra money above 20K not realizing that by doing so he is reducing the employment of other fellow beings.

When I explained what we are trying to do in 5 wards as action research, even the simple 3 steps of outreach, informed form filling by group discussions and a prioritization by citizens in presence of the administration and the elected representatives sounded a huge expectation. “Will it work?” They asked me. That’s exactly what we want to see if it works or not.

May all realize their responsibility towards the waste they generate and may they use their mind prudently towards the people who make their (formal sector) life better by making their (informal sector) own life dirty! 

What a Walk!! A Ward Walk!

Where did that hesitation disappear? Why was it there in the first place? Where did it come from? I have no clue why I didn’t do it all these days what I finally did today. I was so happy doing it that I actually messaged AM saying that, “feeling like I am the heroine of the movie called PB!! Enjoying the ward walk and talking to new people!”

All this while, I was feeling that I am stuck because I don’t have anyone with me to do it. But when did I start having this need of having someone with me. I used to tease my friends in school and college that they needed someone to go with them even to go to washroom. I never needed one like that. Even to explore the world beyond the college life, I travelled alone to far off places in India, stayed in people’s houses whom I met only after reaching there, ate the local food even when my eyes couldn’t control flowing for its spice, drank the milk of camel in the Calotropis (Rui) leaf for the want of a container, rode on the bike of strangers to reach even more unknown places and people and so on.

But everything is changing, so am I. I felt stuck. I needed someone to walk with me in my ward. I was asking help to other group members and to friends to join me. I was procrastinating the action. Finally, I could feel that the pressure is getting built within me is because of the non-action. I must do it. Let it happen the way it would happen but let me just do it, even if I feel unprepared for it.

It reminds me of James clear’s article on 2 minute rule. Just decide to do it for 2 minutes whatever you are unable to do. Once you start it will take you along and you wouldn’t realize when the 2 minutes became 2 hours.

I had decided to take just a small part of the ward which was walk-able in one go. I took the closest road from where I was. A laminated map in one hand, a blue umbrella in another and the mobile purse in the neck, favourite walking shoes for the feet,  a smile on the face, curiosity and inquisitiveness in the eyes, enthusiasm and empathy in the heart, I was ready to go.

For the first time, the road flex boards made some sense to me. Now I know why they are there. I don’t justify them, especially the way an-aesthetically they are put and for the apparent reasons they are put for. But at the same time they serve as the Non – Virtual Public Information System!! Whoa!! Sounds a big name for the poor flex boards!

I came across an Auto Riksha Stand and started reading the board. I had some questions and asked a Riksha Driver waiting for customer. Interestingly, after I told the purpose of this inquisitiveness, he offered me to come to their annual meeting which happens around the planning of Shravan celebrations. He was open to exchange the contact numbers and we did that promising to meet for the Annual meeting. He also shared the nuances of their relationship with other Riksha drivers from other areas who are not member of this Auto stand.

Going ahead, I see a vacant patch of land behind a shop on the road. I casually ask the owner of the temporarily constructed shop about the ownership of the land and he knows it. This shouldn’t come to me as a surprise for sure. The neighbourhood always knows more about each other. Around the corner I see some Yuva Munch and I inquire about them. I couldn’t see the person who runs it but surely could secure his contact to go meet him later.

The laminated map of my prabhag (electoral ward) told me that I was crossing the boundary of my prabhag, but I was very much in my admin ward. Pune has 14 Administrative Wards and every Admin Ward has 4-5 prabhags leading to total number of 76. The road ahead looked interesting for there existed no traffic, farms on one side, big wide divider without any cement blocks. I had been on this road to some extent before but had never checked where it leads. It was a lonely and lovely road. I came across few school children playing along the road. To my obvious question their answer came in such an obvious tone as if the entire world knew where the road lead to except me. The cheerful faces encouraged me to go ahead.

Towards the end of this road at the wide divider some plantation was on. I greeted the gardener and inquired about the species of the plant he was planting. I knew it was Golden Duranta as they call it. It is used heavily as a hedge plant. The trend is to make a complete monoculture of it for that purpose. In itself, Duranta is not that bad as many insects visit its flowers and fruits. But monoculture is something not very healthy for the environment. We don’t care of our own health, when will we think of Environment health though for our own selfish motive? Also, I had recently learnt from the PMC authorities that the government nurseries no more harbor exotic species. They are now completely native plants’ nurseries. The new plantation done by PMC are of native or naturalized species. They are also trying to phase out the exotics already planted. This is what intrigued me to explore who is planting Duranta?  

A discussion with these gardeners led me to a big residential development project getting constructed at the end of the road. I tried tracking down the person who could be taking decisions about what to plant where but with no success. While returning, I happened to speak to the gardener again and enquired about him and let him do the same about me. I divulged the details of PB and the purpose of my walk. He seemed impressed and told me how he works in 2 shifts in the Sewage Treatment Plant (STP) just opposite the construction which I had already visited. I felt disappointed by my nonobservance that I would have missed out an important place if I hadn’t spoken to the Gardener. But now I realizing that my low observation is compensated by more listening. I ask questions and like to listen to their answers, not to argue but to know them genuinely. I do that with almost every informal sector person around me.

I rushed back and entered the building like a queen to meet the head of the STP. I was lucky enough to be able to meet the lab-in-charge lady on the field itself (not in the office). She took me around and showed what stages our toilet waste goes through before meeting the river. It was much better than my visit to the biogas plant and the organic Waste composting plant which exist and operate very well in my ward. I always wanted to visit one and here I was visiting, so much by chance!! The lady seemed so interested in her work and felt completely at home at this plant.

I am so pleased to meet all such wonderful people in the system which we keep cribbing about without knowing anything about it. I enquired with her about being part of the IBA (Inquiry Based Approach) team and she seemed completely on board. 

The capacity of the plant is 30 MLD and is generally underused except for monsoon where the inflow increases. The local residents are generally not ready to the work as it involves working with dirt while people from rural area forms their crew.

Thanking the gardener I decided to call a day and headed back when an informal settlement attracted my attention. These were the labours of the construction work and were staying on the builder’s land (!) itself. I didn’t know how to and what to interact with migrants though we had briefly talked about it in one of our meetings. I somehow tell them the purpose of my unsolicited visit and get nicely shocked (a little less than that) by their direct questions, “what exactly do you want to do?”

I head back and prefer walking on the other side of the road to not miss out on things on that side of the road. A blue colored industrial looking shade amidst the farms waiting to be developed (!) into counties and villas asked for my attention. Siesta occupied that space owing to the time of the day and the hard work the women must have put into in the morning making the food for Anganwadis of Pune. The shyness which couldn't be dissolved by my soft skills could reveal only this much along with the name of the person who was in-charge of the place.

I was thirsty and really wanted to go back and share the success of the ward walk which I had so much hesitated all this while. I was happy that I had gone alone which helped me explore according to my pace, curiosity and empathy. I didn’t have to deal with somebody else’s hesitation and mental blocks. I saw so many new places which are at a distance not more than a km from where I sit every day.

This reminds me what the snake-friends tell about snakes, ‘they are always around us but we see them rarely.’

     

    

All ideas are valid?

I just couldn't stay in the meeting anymore. Why? I was asking myself. I feel hurt if my ego comes in between the process. (What a sentence!! Who is hurt? Isn't that ego itself?)

It was an internal meeting. This is an action research and has an iterative process. Plan -> Implement -> Reflect -> Improve -> Plan!! Period? There is no period. It can go on and on as long as you have patience/ resources/ willingness to carry out what you are doing.

So we, the community facilitators (CFs) and the coordinators of the process were sitting together to reflect upon the process that has been happening over last 2 weeks. We were supposed to go out to the ward, meet people, tell them that PB (I hope, by now you know what PB is!! It's Participatory Budgeting.) exists. If they already know it, understand the process as they see it, tell them what we propose alternatively at least in 5 wards which will take it closer to a better PB process. If they are the decision makers like the Corporators or Ward Officer, we also have to take their consent and assurance to implement the way we are proposing it. We are at the same time  planning the next year. To meet the financial needs, the long term planning seems important.

It is all very overwhelming. It looks like a herculean task to me. It is tough to break out of the comforts of the chair. There were days when I used to move about  forests and grasslands and streams and rivers and beaches. I met them so easily, with hardly any planning. But meeting people, it takes so much of planning!! I never knew that it would un-stabilize me so much. I used to think and had debated over this with friends that how much I am prepared to have uncertainty in life. How much I am a 'Ghus India' person!! Now, that the uncertainty of meeting new people arrive I know how much I was not prepared for it. Meeting new people as a by product and as the main task are two absolutely different processes.

Coming to why I was unable to sit in the meeting...

When we were learning the Inquiry Based Approach our facilitator took us through a process of deciding the rules of the game. it seemed so interesting. When the team gets built, the team also decides the rules by which they would like to deliberate, facilitate the process within the group and outside the group. I really liked one rule among many 'All ideas are valid.' Looking down upon someone for telling an idea which doesn't exactly fit into the social norm doesn't really makes the process inclusive. When you have so many stake holders on your inquiry team, they are going to see the problem from various perspectives. In fact that's the purpose of having all the stakeholders on board. The solution according to everyone is bound to be different. What is important is everyone listens to all ideas and be tolerant to them and slowly evolve something which resolves the problem for everyone and not for just few. Then if you don't have the rule of 'All ideas are valid', it would be disastrous, harmful to the process of consensus.

This is exactly was happening to me, incidentally. For some reasons, the coordinator overlooked my ideas too many times in a series. I agree, not every idea turns out to be practical but at the same time its very encouraging for the team and trust building that we listen to each other's ideas patiently, without ridiculing them. I reached my tipping point too early, may be owing to my low mood (for whatever reasons). With multiple abortions, my mind wasn't ready to conceive any more ideas. I was finding myself more of a disturbance in the process than a contributor. Another thought was, we are going to be the facilitators in the community which is going to be heterogeneous, much less tolerant to each other's needs. If we can't be democratic in such a small group of more cohesive people, how do we think we would be better off facilitating the community?    

I had to walk out to keep myself sane, to think about what was happening to me and to drop the ego if there was any and to be part of the process as soon as possible. He realized pretty soon and came to call me but I took much longer than I had thought. I was really hurt. My process of visualizing the future was hurt. Even then both of us knew that its not personal. We just needed the time to convey it to each other. We couldn't take it personally, we couldn't afford to. Soon after the meeting was over (which I did join in a short while though with a lower profile like a wounded bird) we could and did convey that how sorry we were for the incidence, for not letting the idea flow and aborting them and for not getting any new after that.

The process was more reassuring and realized that the primary function of every human being is to connect and reconnect, we find various ways around it to do it differently in every case. Thanks to the Team which behaved just normally even for an abnormal/ unexpected incidence!      


   

Roses from the Ward Office

I was aware that the ward officer is good. He is not only aware about Participatory Budgeting (PB) but also has been active in making it a success. He has been doing it since the inception of PB around 7 years ago in 2006 - 2007 when it was initiated by the then Municipal Commissioner Mr. Nitin Kareer. In spite of all this assurance. it took me an entire week or even more to break my initial barrier to go out and start meeting people in my Ward.

While doing the pilot study for the current project on PB, 6 months back in November 2014, I had met him. Now as part of "Know your Ward", we, the community facilitators are also supposed take a lot many interviews. Ward Officer's interview is one of the most crucial, important one.  

The questionnaire was made by SM, also drawing some inputs/ experiences from her research work. It's a long one but a comprehensive one. I was afraid if I will be able to engage the person, in this case the W.O., to answer all the questions. So we had discussed beforehand which part we will exclude in such case. It's about a personal initiative for ensuring people's participation and the experiences related to that.

The easiest was part 4 where we seek the support and acceptance from the W.O. or any other interviewee like the key informants/ Corporators from the ward as I didn't have to convince him to accept the proposed alternative way of doing PB in our chosen wards. But this can be very difficult in some other cases especially where they feel that people's participation may increase their work as well as its delays the process (which to some extent is true.) But participation in decision making is nothing but deepening democracy. Democracy is an abstract idea while participation is the manifestation of it. (These are not my sentences, I heard them somewhere but liked them a lot and felt them at the heart of my heart!!)

At the end of a successful interview with the W.O., we were about to leave when he, pleased with our job offers us roses which were there on his table. That was, I felt, a moment of joy, bonding, empathizing with the system and understanding it. We celebrated it throughout the day and are still on the high of it.  It gave us more encouragement for rest of the interviews of people from varied backgrounds playing various role in the society.

More than that I also swear to myself that there is no point cribbing about the system and saying it's bad. It's not. It can be made better, no doubt, and there are good people in it striving to make it better.